Please Don’t Say These Six Things at My Funeral |

So, I was thinking about my death. Yup, I do that from time to time (and if you are honest…. well…). Maybe it is because I am a pastor and am called upon to speak in the face of death quite often. Maybe it is because we all wrestle with our mortality in some way. Maybe its because I am weird. But, I came across this blog shared by a friend, and so I ask you that will attend me in death: Please Don’t Say These Six Things at My Funeral |.



3 thoughts on “Please Don’t Say These Six Things at My Funeral |

  1. Julie Nash


    Your post reminded me of a poem my mother (Carol Jacoby) wrote on July 23, 1991. She is still alive but oddly enough, our son died on that date just 8 years later.

    Euphemistically Speaking: I’m Dead

    When that day dawns
    And life is gone
    Don’t say that I expired,
    Crossed the Jordan, Fell asleep
    Don’t think I’m just overly tired!

    My subscription to Life was not cancelled,
    My Tent didn’t up and fold,
    No bucket got kicked,
    Didn’t pass away,
    Up yonder, my name was rolled!

    No spinning off this mortal coil
    As if I’d lost my grip
    I never was electrical
    And Off my switch didn’t flip!

    So when you speak of my demise
    No longer on Earth to abide
    Please give me a share of love and respect,
    Just tell them that I died!

  2. Nancy

    Funerals are also a time to minister to those who don’t know or want to know what happens “next” – and truthfully, until we stand before Jesus and He sees inside our hearts, He will know if our Baptism/Confirmation was just an event in our lives, or if it really was the day our old lives died (buried under the water) and our new life were born in Christ (resurrected out of the water). If you have ever felt there was a time where you “left” the church to seek your own pleasures and would like to “renew” your baptism commitment to Christ; believe it or not, you will find this ceremony located in the Holy Trinity Lutheran Church pew hymnals.
    Pastors don’t always understand this and will ask why we feel our “first” baptism wasn’t “good enough” as it has been for them (and others in the church) because they never “left” the church (those who can relate to the “older son”). The rest of us (who can relate to the “prodigal son”), need to “bury” the life we sot on our own and be “reborn” into Christ’s life – for ‘our’ infant baptism/confirmation was just an “event” in our lives that made our parents feel safe in case we died before we could make our own decision to live God’s life instead of our own.
    A Marriage is a contract, before God, that states this is whom I will live the rest of my life with, not entered into lightly, and until death. However, sin enters into our lives and marriage contracts are broken, divorce papers are issued, and some make a new Marriage contract with God. Remember, Jesus was baptized as an adult – even though he NEVER sinned as a youth. Have you broken your baptismal contract with God? Do you need to “rebury” the choices you made as the prodigal son and “renew” the Holy Spirit within you? Just like the prodigal son never stopped being the father’s son, you will never stop being God’s child – but just because we are all God’s children, doesn’t mean we will all live in God’s house; the home Jesus has prepared. I what the honest truth spoke at my funeral, for I know there are more prodigal sons in today’s world than there are the older sons who never left and I am glad to read Holy Trinity is wanting to be the “celebration” as prodigal sons decide to return.

    1. Nancy, the rite you to which you refer in the hymnal is called “Affirmation of Baptism” and is used with regularity. It is used when people become members of the congregation; when young people are confirmed. We use it on Sundays throughout the year with “sprinkling” the congregation so we can remember the event of our baptism. The rite can be used pastorally with individuals when appropriate. Martin Luther called on every baptized Christian to begin each day by making the sign of the cross as a reminder of baptism, and praying the Small Catechism. Because we are saints and sinners all at the same time, each day is marked by our drift from God and our welcome home to God’s loving embrace.

      This post was really about how we think about and face death. The point for me is that “since nothing can separate me from the love of God in Christ” not eve death (Romans 8) I don’t need to find ways to make death palatable.I don’t need angels, or disembodied spirits, or to know what heaven is like. Just give me Jesus. If he is beyond death, I’m fine with that and nothing more. That allows me to embrace death fully and honestly.

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